Tuesday, July 01, 2008

Pushy



No not her

The pushy person you know

Without being rude how do you say no

Unfortunately it is often not possible

Why?

Because over time you have allowed this person to dictate and behave as they will with you

It does not seem polite to tell them to behave differently

More respectfully

And because they are masters of pushing, ignoring your gentle resistance to their request or self invitation you don't feel you can

So if this annoys and really gets under your skin then time to consider taking action

Formulate clearly what you do not like in their behaviour

Look them in the eyes and tell them

Do this without going into details, because this just produces more denials or self justifications

Say that you do not like their pushy behaviour

That you prefer not to meet again

Or softer that if it continues then you prefer not to meet

And here is the real point

They have thick skins and are used to brushing aside feeble complaints

Ignoring what they do not like to hear

Have only an interest in themselves and what they want from you

It is your time to be firm no ifs and buts no wimping

Just the clear simple statement that you do not like their behaviour

Nothing else penetrates

Nothing else will get across that you have had enough

If you cannot do this then look at yourself and decide to learn how to take back your power

In all of us there is enough power to say we do not like things that upset us

You might have thought it was easier to give in than have a fight

Now you have learned that it is not

Pushy people rely on others being too good mannered or soft to stand up to them

Find your power it is a waste of time and life putting up with pushy people.

They do not change

So time for you to change

Also it is time to ask yourself why you spend time with people who use you?

Why you allow yourself to be used?

Why do you?

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