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Wednesday, April 07, 2010
Family
Is something we all have issues with
Even if we have no family we have the issue that we do not have a family!
Our understanding of how this family situation can best be is critical for our well being
Over the course of a lifetime not sorting this out can cost you dearly
Not being at peace with how it is can really hurt
Running away or rejecting family is not a smart solution as this just causes more wear and tear
Many families pretend that you have to behave in certain ways
That you owe them
That they made huge sacrifices so now you must
It is said that you must do this or that
All of this without mentioning the rivalries
The divisions between various branches of the family
So how best to be with family then?
Being clear about the games being played is a good start
Once you see who is using who
Who does not like who
Who is manipulating who
These are all to be seen and where you do not see them ask a neutral what they see
Ask an outsider
Once you have some objectivity about this then consider where are you?
Who is using you?
Who are you using?
Do you want to continue this?
Most important as an idea is that you chose this family
You chose your parents as those best able to give you the start you needed in this life
Not the kindest maybe but those best able to give you that start
Your brothers and sisters, cousins, nieces nephews are often relationships with those you had problems with in other lives
Now how is that for a thought?
Which of course is why you have these issues with them this time around
Frequently this will be the reverse of that in the previous life
For example if you were a bully last life then this time around you might well find yourself being bullied
Once you look at it this way it is easier to make sense of things in the various family relationships
And once you learn to sort it then it changes
You can move on
Family is always a challenge
Take your power back and use it to place all the relationships on a reasonable basis
Where this is not possible then behave correctly and leave alone
Get on with your own life
Move on
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