Games we play

Predator males will say anything to gain sex from their prey

They will say whatever it takes to get the woman into bed

Having done this once or twice they move on

Not concerned in the slightest about the feelings of the woman they seduced

And if the woman does not understand what has happened then these men will be cold, distant, rude and withdrawn

The objectives were different

The difference was that the hunter was clear

The woman also but unaware of being the prey

Not aware that lying and promises were simply tools of the trade for the hunter

Now flip it around and you have the woman who is the hunter

She too is very clear about what she is doing

Sometimes she can just want the male for sex, but more often her goal is long term

She will play the long game and has patience that often obscures her designs from the male

There are endless variations on the above themes and all are used

Our point?

In any relationship there is usually need

Identify the need in the other party and you can better see what your relationship is all about

Quite often this will not be what you thought it was

Better to know earlier on though

Still might hurt but not so much as when you find out later that you are being used

Used unacceptably that is because most of us use each other

What we are talking about is where this using is above and beyond acceptable

Are you an abuser or a user?

Are you being used or abused?

Being used can be fine if both parties are agreed

If not then check it out and see if the reality is not what you thought it was