How to feel relaxed during stressful times?
How to turn off
How to let go
One of the most irritating things said to me many years ago was "let go"
Let go?
Let go of what I asked?
There followed an explanation that totally confused and frustrated me
It frustrated me because I could not understand that I was not able to relax
I felt that I was relaxed but in reality I was busy trying to control things
Life had to be on my terms
I had my own perception of everything
Which was often not reality for others
Was not what they perceived me to be
When their perceptions did not fit mine I would get irritated or angry
Like when told to let go and could not understand what they meant
Slowly it began to dawn on me that I was really in a not so pleasant repeating pattern
Things kept going wrong
I began to try new courses and activities that promised self realization, offering to empower me, show me this and that, you name it I tried it
And not one of these courses gave me what I was looking for
One reason being that dimly I knew that I was not happy inside
But had problems admitting this
Finding fault in others
.
Finding frustration in myself while blaming the world and others
Being judgemental and critical
Without realising it I had crossed a major hurdle
I was now admitting to myself that I had a problem
The second insight was realising that no one other than myself was responsible for this state of affairs
Then came the understanding that I was the one who had to change this
No course could do this although certainly several courses I attended gave me insights into other aspects and possibilities
Too often they added little except more frustration
Often I had this feeling that they did not really know much either
Over time I learned to see that those who did not know much talked a lot
Claimed a lot and when questioned or challenged would retreat into jargon or a mumbo jumbo of how I was not ready or how this was secret or how I did not understand
And so this went on for a long time
Then basically I gave up on the courses and started reading more
Spending more time in nature
Beginning to do things that I had put off and really decided I wanted to do
One such was Shiatsu
Through this I began to find some peace in myself
Began to calm down and to see how uptight I was
Shiatsu led to other healing arts
To helping others which lead to doing different things in my life
What was happening during this period was that the focus was coming off myself
Less thought about myself, me
More about other people, becoming interested and concerned about their problems
And then one day I got it I realised I was beginning to let go
Another breakthrough came when I met someone who I felt had something different
What I was not sure, however her peace and calm disposition hit some space in me
I wanted to understand how she maintained this composure and friendliness during very demanding situations
I was lucky that she gave me some time
She gave me what she called a correction using her skills to help me let go further unblocking old pains
A lot more of the old tensions came out of me
And she told me simple things I could do to keep this experience expanding
So finally I was learning how to let go and to move on
And you where are you on your own journey of self understanding?
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