Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Not very easy

To get through those first two years of your child's life

Not easy on the parents that is

Modern parents typically living on their own with their children have to make it on their own

Traditionally there would have been grandparents and other family members around to help

Today not so often

And the outcome of this is stress and more stress


Because most parents get less than four hours uninterrupted rest a night because of crying offspring.
They suffer a huge sleep debt

Leading to mood swings



And even relationship break-ups.
Most adults need at least five hours of uninterrupted sleep every 24 hours to function properly

Many need as much as eight hours.
But almost two thirds of parents with babies and under-twos get just three-and three-quarters hours, according to recent studies 
That's just 75% of the minimum recommended length of uninterrupted sleep.
And some very unlucky parents - 12% of those surveyed - get less than two-and-a-half hours of uninterrupted sleep per night.
Over the course of two years, and even accounting for regular power-naps, that means the majority of mothers and fathers miss out on six months sleep.
Add to this the other stresses associated with bringing up very young children and you have a potential for long term damage to the relationship
More often the experience leads to long term changes in the relationship
Changes that fix perceptions of each other in a new light

A light that is often less favourable than the one you had before your baby arrived

What to do?

Time and honesty

Time to recover

Honesty to discuss and review behaviour and habits that are unacceptable

Yes most young parents learn a lot more about each other through the arrival of a child than they knew before

Good and bad

The more open they are with each other the better the relationships chances for the future

Provided of course that they are prepared to compromise

Compromise being a central part of any successful relationship

Will you?

Can you?

Without compromise and and adjustment those weakness and faults seen during those early parenting months can fester and lead to greater problems later on

Focus on the good things seen

Make appreciation of the other known to your partner

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