Saturday, September 27, 2008

Saying and meaning


Gentlemen and why no gentlewoman?

Somehow gentlemen seems a funny name for men who are often nothing of the sort

How many men today qualify for this term?

Meanwhile the other term ladies is also a misnomer for many of the women being called by this description

We slowly alter our language by using terms that over time lose their original meanings

This leads us to have very different understandings of what is said in different communities and parts of the planet

It becomes ever more difficult to know precisely what the other person is really saying

Or meaning

Add in the number of people who do not speak your own language as their first or even second language and we have problems

How many of the problems today are caused by different understandings of what people really mean?

No one really knows although it must be considerable

Maybe time for all of us to stop taking it for granted that when we speak the other person hears what we want them to hear

In particular when men speak with women we need to be attentive that we are indeed communicating accurately

As most know men and women manage to misunderstand each other with alarming frequency

This miscommunication causes all sorts of problems often leading to serious situations

While it is not always possible to be accurate or find the right words most of us have enough words
to say what we want

The problem lies in our perceptions, perceptions formed on faulty or poor information

When we type into our computers we pay attention as our electronic world will not accept sloppy inputs

Or if they are sloppy then we do not get the information we want or pass on the communications we intend

So why in communicating with each other do we not pay the same degree of attention?

The same respect

In communicating with each other too often we are sloppy, not paying attention

Not really listening

Not giving importance to the other

The consequences can be dire if less dramatic than a car crash caused by our inattention

They can be life changing like divorce, relationship breakdown, loss of money and so on

The point?

Simply the effort you put in to many aspects of your life is often equal to what you get out

So why not put the most effort into relationships, which are usually the most important
challenge in life?.

No more sloppy inputs

Lets try to be gentlemen and ladies

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