Wednesday, April 07, 2010

Family




Is something we all have issues with

Even if we have no family we have the issue that we do not have a family!

Our understanding of how this family situation can best be is critical for our well being

Over the course of a lifetime not sorting this out can cost you dearly

Not being at peace with how it is can really hurt

Running away or rejecting family is not a smart solution as this just causes more wear and tear

Many families pretend that you have to behave in certain ways

That you owe them

That they made huge sacrifices so now you must

It is said that you must do this or that

All of this without mentioning the rivalries

The divisions between various branches of the family

So how best to be with family then?

Being clear about the games being played is a good start

Once you see who is using who

Who does not like who

Who is manipulating who

These are all to be seen and where you do not see them ask a neutral what they see

Ask an outsider

Once you have some objectivity about this then consider where are you?

Who is using you?

Who are you using?

Do you want to continue this?

Most important as an idea is that you chose this family

You chose your parents as those best able to give you the start you needed in this life

Not the kindest maybe but those best able to give you that start

Your brothers and sisters, cousins, nieces nephews are often relationships with those you had problems with in other lives

Now how is that for a thought?

Which of course is why you have these issues with them this time around

Frequently this will be the reverse of that in the previous life

For example if you were a bully last life then this time around you might well find yourself being bullied

Once you look at it this way it is easier to make sense of things in the various family relationships

And once you learn to sort it then it changes

You can move on

Family is always a challenge

Take your power back and use it to place all the relationships on a reasonable basis

Where this is not possible then behave correctly and leave alone

Get on with your own life

Move on

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